Today, I feel the need to share a few thoughts that I have been having. I am sharing partly because maybe this will encourage someone else, also because for me writing how I am feeling helps me think things through and understand things a little better. It's the best way for me to gather my thoughts and get back to the clear vision of the path that I am on! I'm just going to be a little transparent in this post, so I hope that from this someone else will be encouraged.
This week for me has been a roller coster of emotions. Monday was full of crying. Tuesday and Wednesday was full of hard work and happiness. Thursday was also full of hard work, and then huge frustration and ended in huge disappointment. Friday, I am determined to be a day of simply being thankful for this life I have, the creativity I have, and the opportunities that have been given to me. I know that everyone has weeks like this. Heck, some people have years upon years like this. But, these past few weeks I have been so discouraged with building my business. I knew this would be a hard endeavor but I never knew how hard. It's definitely not for the Faint of Heart.
If you don't know exactly what I do, please let me explain that really quickly. In a nut shell, I am a graphic designer. But, to be specific, I work with photographers retouching their images as well as do design work here and there! I love what I do and really take pride in my work. I have learned very quickly these past few months that like most artists, all photographers are drastically different in their style and how they like things done. I knew this from the beginning and decided it was something that I can handle. I'm learning! And this is where the discouragement comes. If you know me, you know I am a little bit of a perfectionist. So when someone isn't just over-the-moon crazy about my work, that hurts my pride a little bit and I immediately want to fix it and get them exactly what they want. To a perfectionist, really this is a shot in the gut and is a hard pill to swallow...not sometimes, but every single time.
How I handle the discouragement can really take a tole on me taking risks that could have really rewarding benefit. If I am being honest, my biggest fear is failure and having a few rejections can quickly make you feel like you're directly on the path to failure. Although this is tough for my perfectionism, I am learning that discouragement isn't just there to get me down. Its an opportunity to grow and to actually practice being courageous! Being courageous, hard working and using the skills the God has given me will have a much more rewarding impact on my life than fear of failure and rejection will have.
It's so important for me as an artist to simply remember that I AM AN ARTIST. Everyone see's differently. Everyone works differently, but that doesn't make me any less of an artist. I have learned to take the opportunity of discouragement and use it to my advantage to count it as a learning experience and chance to build my courage and determination!! If you're reading this and feeling like you're reading your life story, please know you aren't alone! Love yourself enough to believe whole heartedly in what God has called you to do and trust in the gifts that he has given you!
Happy Friday Dear Friend!